Eine Oase ist ein guter Ort, um innezuhalten, sich zu sammeln, zu reflektieren und die Batterien aufzuladen. Jede Woche gibt mir reichlich Inspiration in Bezug auf Themen; mögliche Quellen sind Coaching-Sitzungen, Gespräche mit Familienmitgliedern und Freunden, meine eigene Lektüre oder einer der vielen Beiträge und Podcasts, die ich unterwegs genieße. Ein Thema wird mich Anfang der Woche ansprechen und ich habe dann große Freude an dem iterativen Prozess des Entwerfens, Überarbeitens, Polierens und Fertigstellens jedes Aufsatzes. Dann folgt die Auswahl eines passenden, meist aktuellen Fotos aus meiner Sammlung, um das aktuelle Thema visuell zu akzentuieren. Wenn Sie die Artikel in Deutsch lesen möchten, klicken Sie bitte auf den entsprechenden orangenen Button „Translate >>“.
Ich lade Sie ein, sich eine kleine Auszeit zu nehmen, Ihre eigene sechsminütige Oase zu schaffen, einen bequemen Stuhl zu finden, sich niederzulassen und zu lesen. Mögen Sie ein Gefühl der Identifikation erleben und hoffentlich etwas Inspiration in diesen wöchentlichen Reflexionen finden. Wenn so, fühlen Sie sich frei, die `Weekly Reflections´ zu abonnieren:
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Schließlich sind Feedback und Kommentare immer sehr willkommen. Ich wünsche viel Genuß bei der Lektüre!
While attending a silent (vipassana), week-long meditation retreat many years ago, my upper back and shoulders filled with so much pain on day two that I decided to ask for a short meeting with the facilitator. My intention was to inform him that, due to the excruciating pain, I was going to drop out early and go home…
When working with people who have decided to make major changes in their lives in the context of giving up behaviors which, though clearly detrimental to themselves and those they love, they seem to have great difficulty in leaving behind on a permanent basis, the phenomenon of the ego invariably arises. These people often find themselves baffled by their own destructive behaviors which, unlike many other areas of their lives, seem immune to the direction of their often very substantial willpower.
On looking up `sober´, in addition to the more obvious meaning of `not being intoxicated´, a second definition is listed, namely; `based on sound reasoning or information´ as in `a sober assessment of the situation´.
Webster´s gives us two definition of oasis, as follows; `A fertile or green area in an arid region (such as a desert)´ and `Something that provides refuge, relief, or pleasant contrast´, as in `the small park is a welcome oasis amid the city’s many factories´. The roots go back to an Egyptian term wḥꜢ.t with the meaning; `fertile area in the desert´.
`You need to quit playing God!´ This is what I heard more than once in my early years of recovery from alcoholism. It precipitated an undifferentiated jolt, like an earthquake deep under the sea bed, although the meaning of the statement, and the associated possible consequences, went way over my head. Perhaps I did not want to understand.
Generally speaking the meaning of this (nowadays emotive) term, with its roots in Old Greek (apokalyptein – “uncover, disclose, reveal,” from apo “off, away from” + kalyptein “to cover, conceal,”) refers to `drawing back the veil´ in order to see things differently, perhaps even moving from `perception´ to `vision´, and hence from `illusion´ to `truth´. This rang a bell with me when I remembered what Wayne Dyer used to say about `not seeing the world as it is, but rather as we are´
The issue of boredom came up in a conversation during the week. A young friend was complaining about it, saying that he was plagued by the long days in lockdown, feeling depleted and guilty about how he was squandering his time. Only later in the day, long after we had parted, did it hit me that the real issue was apathy, a topic not often discussed.
“Apathy is the belief, `I can´t´. It is the feeling that we cannot do anything about our situation and no one else can help. It is hopelessness and helplessness.´´ Thus writes David Hawkings in his magnum opus `Letting Go´
While it is true that the spiritual path is open to everybody, not everybody follows the call. Some never even get to hear the call. This remains one of the great mysteries, to be simply accepted as a characteristic of the human condition.
For most of my life, I fell prey to the very widespread illusion that the cause of all my problems is ‘out there’. In practical terms, it unfolds roughly as follows: Whenever I experienced `irritation´ in the world `out there´ (when my plans fell through, when I didn’t get my way, regretted the past, feared the future, or when I adjuged that I was being treated unjustly of unfairly, etc.), I reacted by exerting more force to `kick the world into shape´. Despite my heroic efforts, it rarely worked.
Despite having lived in Continental Europe for decades, my inner clock still marks time as I first encountered the concept in my Irish childhood. While, in early adulthood, the hard Bavarian winters often froze our garden pond from early December through to late March, my soul would begin to yearn for the first flashes of colour even before January came to an end. The snowdrops, crocuses and narcissi spung up before my mind’s eye, causing a palpable perception of temporal misalignment between the inner and outer worlds.
“In to me see.” True intimacy is one of the greatest challenges for me. As with all of the new behaviours, it gets easier with practice, that is daily practice. For any transformation process – if it is to be successful and sustained over time – is made up of 20% insights and 80% practice. That is the key. And remember, it is not true that: “Practice makes perfect” (for that is the Judge Saboteur coming in through the back door again,) but rather that: “Practice makes for progress.”
How many of us have done this in our own lives? We get hurt, betrayed, lied to, or abandoned, and instead of healing, we obsess on the apparent cause of our suffering. We replay conversations. We wait for apologies that may never come. We try to explain ourselves to people who have already shown us they could never truly listen. We pour our energy into understanding the one who hurt us (so we can better manipulate their thoughts, feelings, and actions) instead of caring for the part of us that has been wounded. The truth is simple, even if uncomfortable: Some people bite because they are in the grip of their fear-driven Saboteurs. Systems driven by fear wound because that’s how they are designed…
As long as we are constantly hijacked by our Saboteurs, fear rules our lives and the lives of those around us. This takes place sometimes very obviously, sometimes more subtly. Fear’s toolbox contains a very powerful device that, if not addressed and relinquished, will ensure that the old order will forever rule the day. This device is denial. For many years I stewed in the juice of denial. Sara Bareilles describes the dynamic eloquently in her sublime song “Orpheus“:
Missing the world
The one you knew
The one where everything made sense because you
didn’t know the truth…..
Indeed, many of us didn’t know the truth for long stretches of our lives. Denial has an important role to play in our survival…
© 2022 SoberOasis | Patrick Little
