Emotional Availability
Part of the original process of suppressing my feelings was the creation of a kind of mélange in which feelings, emotions, beliefs, and interpretations were all mixed up together, leading to confusion, or zero emotional visibility, to borrow a phrase from meteorology.
„I feel neglected“ is not a feeling. It is a belief that we hold. „You are disrespecting me“ is an interpretation. „She’s plain evil“ is a judgement. „You make my life miserable“ is an accusation. „I feel deeply sad“ is, indeed, the expression of a feeling. To make matters even more complicated, the boundaries between me and the other (Mother, Father, sibling, etc.) became fuzzy, so I couldn’t be really sure if that which I was feeling belonged to me or someone else…
Fate
After several failed attempts, one day, at last, Finnegas caught the Salmon of Knowledge. He brought it home and instructed Fionn to cook it, warning him not to taste even a single bite. As Fionn roasted the fish on a spit over the open fire, he noticed the scaly skin forming blisters. Of course, he wanted the fish not only to taste delicious but to be well presented, so he pressed his thumb on a blister to flatten it down. In doing so, he burned his thumb on the hot skin. Without thinking, he put his thumb into his mouth to sooth the pain. In that moment, all the wisdom of the salmon passed into him…
Leading Meditation
I like the story about Mother Teresa being once asked by a young journalist to describe her daily prayer and meditation practice.
„I simply sit in silence and pray“, she answered with clarity.
„What do you say?“, asked the journalist, intrigued.
„Oh, I say nothing. I simply listen to God.“ she replied.
„And what does God say? “ asked the journalist, sniffing a sensation…
„God doesn’t say anything, either,“ responded the old nun with a smile. „God simply listens also.“
„If you have never had the experience, nobody can explain it to you,“ she then finished, bowed courteously, and went on her way…
Being „Good“
„A miracle is a shift from fear to love,“ states Marianne Williamson in her commentary on „A Course In Miracles“. That shift, and the awareness of how it can be achieved, is now spreading through recovery communities like wildfire. By recovery communities, I mean the movement originally spawned by a bunch of alcoholics in New York City and Akron, Ohio in the late 1930’s which eventually spread around the world as Alcoholics Anonymous. Now, with membership in the millions, there are over 200 fellowships dealing with the plethora of addictions which plague humanity, such as Workaholism, Food Addiction, Gambling, and most recently, Media Addiction, to mention but a few…
