Developmental Trauma
In the spring before my sixteenth birthday my father had fallen ill. He was diagnosed with lung cancer and had surgery to remove most of his right lung. In those days, the prognosis for such patients was not very good, but his medical colleagues gave him `from one to thirty years´. He didn’t make the one. In the summer and early autumn months of that year, I spent much of the time outside of school hours with him, as he set out on the final stage of this life…
Tomb and Womb
The chrysalis is at one and the same time a tomb, for the caterpillar, and a womb, for the butterfly. In the given situation this may not be apparent at first glance. Impaired by the lens of duality, our perception ensures that one aspect, –usually the receding to which we are so attached, – tends to dominate, and we proceed to engage in a mental struggle between it and its opposite…
Powering Up
But just as a belief in electricity is insufficient when it comes to operating power tools, we must find a way of tapping into the power. Otherwise, the tools are useless. In my garden shed this means connecting the tools to the mains or an appropriately charged battery. The Big Book of AA contends that, for those dealing with addiction, the connection is obscured (blocked) by one of three things, or a combination of same. These are `calamity, pomp, and worship of other things´…
Neediness
I wandered outside again into the yard, to enjoy the spaciousness under the vibrant sky, the brightness and warmth of the July sunshine, and the music of the blanket bog. The mood was carefree; we were all a bit tired, perhaps also hungry, at the tail end of the long day trip…
Free Will
The pertinent question today is the one which addresses my degree of willingness to wake up to the reality of life as it is right now, in the present moment, to accept the mixed bag of wounds and gifts that have accumulated over time, and to embrace the opportunity to heal the old wounds while cultivating and further developing the gifts. Herein lies my free will…
Getting Unstuck
When I got into the car and attempted to reverse out onto the paved lane, there was a rude awakening. The back wheels simply spun on the spot. Zero traction. There I am, facing downhill on a 15% slope, unable to reverse out. I was stuck…
Old Ideas
There is a neurological explanation for this phenomenon. Neural pathways develop over time in line with our experience and corresponding behaviours. They become etched into our brains, offering themselves as the default, `the only way´. Like the diagonal paths that traverse the lawns of poorly designed public parks, our past behaviour dictates how information flows and is processed in our brains…
Inner Guidance
What else would you do with a child who was clearly overwhelmed?´ I asked myself. Empathise, – put myself in his shoes. The origin of the term despondency points to some solemn promise having been broken, – the promise perhaps of protection, nurturing, and trust. I would act in a manner that seeks to protect, provides nurturing, and aims to rebuild trust. That means being fully present, free of judgement…
Falling Apart
Moreover, in an effort to `compensate´ for our parents’ shortcomings, we may have manifested adult levels of maturity far too early in life. While I certainly cultivated strengths such as organisational skills, self-reliance, and independence along the way ― strengths that have served me well in many situations as an adult, ― having to be the emotionally mature person in my relationship with my parent was confusing and has left wounds in its wake…
Sacred Geometry
One further innovation of PQ is the daily practice, neatly and effectively packaged on the PQ App, which facilitates the regular practice which might otherwise fizzle out when we rely on traditional approaches. A transformation process is generally made up of 20% insights and 80% practice, meaning that regular, ongoing practice is essential for it to succeed and be sustained…
